Friends, I don’t know what words might spill out in this post…all I know is that I must write it. I need your thoughts and insight. So, I come here to ask…
How do you feel about “the shoulds?”
I should do this.
I should do that.
I should be keeping the nursery on a regular basis at church.
I should be singing in the choir.
I should be doing more with my kids academically.
I should be giving my kids more exercise.
I should definitely be exercising more myself. A lot more.
I should be baking bread, after all, I got a Bosch. Just for baking bread.
I should be cooking more healthy meals.
I should be more frugal.
I should save more and spend less.
I should care less about myself.
I should think less about myself.
I should help the homeless more.
I should be giving more to the needy.
I should be reaching out to my neighbors on a regular basis.
I should be calling friends who are hurting right now.
I should be sending more notes of encouragement in the mail.
I should be playing with my children.
I should be spending less time on the computer.
I should bake more muffins so my kids can have a healthy breakfast.
I should clean my house more. A lot more.
I should be teaching a Sunday school class.
I should be involved in a homeschool co-op so my kids can have friends.
I should arrange more playdates for my kids.
So, how do you know the difference between GUILT and CONVICTION?
How do you know what you really SHOULD be doing and where you should just say no and rest in God?
I have learned to say no over the past few years. I came out of a deep depression and burn-out season…God taught me how to say no. I’ve said no.
And, God has shown me time and time again over the past year that when I’m too busy with my life’s “stuff” I end up too busy for HIM. I have peace with that. I know it’s ok to not be involved in every little thing. I’m ok with that. I have loved so much being home more and having more time for Bible study, reading great books and prayer.
However, I still have all these little “shoulds” in my life. Everything I listed above I have felt today. A few times. And yesterday. And there are a few more that I haven’t listed.
So, sometimes I’m ok with not doing everything, and then sometimes I read passages like James 1:22, and think of all that I’m not doing.
“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.” James 1:22
And passages like Isaiah 58 that describe what is pleasing to the Lord.
“Is this not the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter – when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?” Isaiah 58:6-7
One other thing to mention is that many of these things I want to be doing. They aren’t bad, negative guilty feelings attached to each of those items, though they are with some. Some of those items I legitimately want to be doing.
I can’t do it all. I know this. I accept this. 🙂 I acknowledge that no mom can. I am not super mom. I am ok with this. Like I said, some days I am fine with where I am…some days I’m not. I guess today is one of those days, so I figured I’d ask you how you deal with it?! And yes, this is definitely a matter of ongoing prayer in my life!
How do I deal with the shoulds? How do you deal with them?