Yielding

Over the last few months God has been whispering a few words to me. Simplicity. Yielding. Keep the main thing the main thing. Surrender.

These words aren’t easy to hear. But, even harder than hearing, they are harder to implement. Major life changes – character changes – lifelong habits – are hard to change. As a teacher I prided myself on the best behaved kindergarten class in the building. As a busy woman, I found energy in being well, busy. I thrived on a calendar with lots and lots of writing. I was a planner. I was organized. I was on top of things. (And yes, before I had kids I can vaguely remember at some point saying, “my child will never do that…”)

Yes, God certainly does have a sense of humor. And no, I’m not proud of that pride I used to have. I thought I could handle 22 little 5 year olds, and handle them quite well. So, God gave me 3 kids in 3 years (that weren’t necessarily planned, disrupting the planner in me.) But, when that wasn’t enough to deter me, He took my hand and guided me into the wilderness. He allowed me to become so overwhelmed with life that depression took over my body -my heart, soul and mind.

Even as a young mom with 3 little ones, I continued running and running…serving at church everytime the doors were open. Volunteering to have playgroup at my house. Playing in a band. Playing for church. Organizing music. Teaching piano lessons. Organizing playdates and homeschool co-ops. Homeschooling. Baking bread. And the list goes on. And on.

Time after time, I find myself back to that “overwhelmed” state of life. Why is it so hard for me to say no? And, even when I am not that busy, I find myself overwhelmed. Again. Depression creeps back in…and for the first time, God begins to show me the meaning of yielding to Him and His plan for my life. God led me here. He brought me to a place where I was forced to slow down. To pay attention. To notice Him.

Have you ever thought about what a yield sign means?

As you are driving down the road, if you see a yield sign that means you need to slow down, possibly even stop. Stop for what? To wait. To wait for other cars to go by. To wait for a light to change. Slow down and wait. Pay attention to what is going on around you…and when it is clear, you may proceed.

How many times do we get going so fast, full speed ahead, that we don’t yield? We don’t yield to the cars zooming past us — and cause a bit of a traffic jam. We don’t yield to the voices of our children. We don’t yield to the quiet whispers of our Lord.

yield: verb, to surrender or submit, as to superior power 

Listen.

Slow down.

Simplicity.

Keep the main thing the main thing. (what is the main thing for you right now?)

Yield.

Surrender. God took me into the wilderness for a purpose. His purpose. His ways don’t look like my ways. His ways are higher than my ways. Yielding means waiting on Him. I can’t “hurry” myself out of this stage of life. I can’t “fix it” though I try with all my might. I must yield. I must wait on Him. Surrender. That means giving up my rights. Going along with His plan. Going along with His purpose. Yielding.

May this be the prayer of my heart…

Have thine own way, Lord! Have thine own way.
Thou art the potter, I am the clay!
Mold me and make me after Thy will,
While I am waiting, yielded and still.

Have thine own way, Lord! Have thine own way.
Search me and try me, Master, today!
Whiter than snow, Lord, wash me just now.
As in Thy presence, humbly I bow.

Have thine own way, Lord! Have thine own way.
Wounded and weary, help me, I pray!
Power, all power surely is Thine,
Touch me and heal me, Savior divine.

Have thine own way, Lord! Have thine own way.
Hold o’er my being absolute sway.
Fill with Thy spirit till all shall see
Christ only, always, living in me.

3 Years Off of Anti-Depressants

I would love for you to read an update now that I have been off all of my anti-depressants for 3 years and am thriving. God has been so good to me. My mindset has changed. My health has changed. We are never truly hopeless if we have Christ. We have the power of the Holy Spirit living within us giving us the power to make the steps necessary to BE TRANSFORMED.

My Journey Off of Anti-Depressants

My wellness journey & 51 pound weight loss!